A friend loves at all times. (Proverbs 17:17)
I didn’t have a good friend until I was in my early 30’s. I was a lonely child, clinging to people and wanting friends, but never finding them. I concluded that there was something wrong with me. And, indeed, there was. The answer is in Proverbs 17:17, “A friend loves at all times.” I have always been a busy person, and for a long time I valued getting things done over spending time with people. So, I was a great student, was an excellent employee, even had a good marriage. Still, I had no friends. No one called me and asked me to go out to dinner, to play games, or go for a walk. No one – ever!
What changed? When I was in my early 30’s, I met a neighbor who was overwhelmed with her three preschool daughters. She was similar to me – a Christian, educated, a dedicated mother, and loved the mountains. I had two preschool sons. Both of our husbands had good jobs, but worked long hours. So, we shared our lives, laughed and played together, even went camping and fishing together. Our children played together. Within a few years, my husband had a heart attack and died – her husband developed bipolar disorder. All of this we shared together. Indeed, we did love each other at all times, as instructed in Proverbs.
Tim Keller wrote, “The reason why we don’t have enough great friends is because we are not great friends!” Yes, indeed, I didn’t have friends early in my life because I was selfishly looking to satisfy my own needs. Everything changed when I changed. If you want to find a great friend, you need to become more concerned about the other person than about yourself. Today, I am blessed with many friends. I took a walk this morning with a friend and discussed the content of this blog posting with her. The content is better because of her help.