Trials and tragedies are often what God uses to break through to someone whose heart was resistant toward him. As C.S. Lewis said, “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” In particular, the pain of losing a loved one can lead someone to think more deeply about the shortness of life and their eternal destiny.
While you can’t offer your friend any comfort that their loved one is in heaven, you can help them process deep things while they are thinking about these things.
The best way to launch spiritual conversations is by asking lots of questions. The first questions could be about the family member who passed away. “What did you appreciate about them? What are some good memories you had together?”
Then you could dig deeper to ask questions about how your friend is doing. “What do you miss most about them? How are you feeling about the loss?”
Then you could share a tragedy or trial you’ve experienced in life, and how God cared for you during your own time of loss.
In a later conversation, you could ask questions about how the loss is affecting your friend’s outlook on life. “How do you usually respond to tough times in life? What are you learning about yourself through this?”
Then you could share about how trials in life have shown you sins that needed to be refined, and how Jesus accomplished that.
Over the course of a number of conversations, your goal is to get to the point where you can share how Jesus is the answer to our deepest needs in life through his death on the cross to pay for our sins and his resurrection from the grave to give us new life.