In Philippians 4, Paul gives a simple but seemingly impossible command: “Do not be anxious about anything.” One of the biggest sources of anxiety for many people is concern about what others think about us or might do to us.
In When People Are Big and God is Small, Edward Welch says this is because we make people into idols:
When we think of idols, we usually think first of Baal and other material, man-made creations. Next we might think of money. We rarely picture our spouse, our children, or a friend from school. But people are our idol of choice. They pre-date Baal, money, and power. Like all idols, people are created things, not the Creator (Rom. 1:25), and they do not deserve our worship. They are worshipped because we perceive that they have power to give us something. We think they can bless us. …
What is the result of this people-idolatry? As in all idolatry, the idol we choose to worship soon owns us. The object we fear overcomes us. Although insignificant in itself, the idol becomes huge and rules us. It tells us how to think, what to feel, and how to act. It tells us what to wear, it tells us to laugh at the dirty joke, and it tells us to be frightened to death that we might have to get up in front of a group and say something. The whole strategy backfires. We never expect that using people to meet our desires leaves us enslaved to them.
He offers some questions to help uncover this people-idolatry:
- What thoughts or actions do you prefer to keep in the dark? Lusts, animosities, certain habits… such activities most likely point to fear of others.
- Have you noticed times when you cover up with lies, justifications, blaming, avoiding, or changing the subject? If so, you want to look better before people.
- Do you show favoritism? Do you respect the rich more than the poor? The intelligent over the less intelligent? This is perhaps the most overlooked expression of the fear of other people. It shows that you respect one person above another.