Kings just aren’t supposed to act the way our king did on this day almost two thousand years ago. So says D.A. Carson in Scandalous:
The mother of the apostles James and John approaches Jesus, along with her two sons, requesting a favor. “What is it you want?” he asks. She replies, “Grant that one of these two sons of mine may sit at your right and the other at your left in your kingdom” (Matt. 20:21). Clearly they anticipated that Jesus would sit as king in a quite normal, historical, physical sense, and make his apostles the members of his cabinet, and they were hoping that James and John would get the two top jobs – secretary of state and secretary of defense, perhaps.
Jesus tells them, in effect, that they have no idea what they are asking for: “Can you drink the cup I am going to drink?” he asks, referring, of course, to his impending suffering. With supreme overconfidence and massive ignorance, they reply, “We can” (v. 22). …
When the ten other apostles hear of the request of James and John and their mother, they are incensed – not, of course, because of the arrogance and impertinence of their request, but because the ten did not get their requests in first. So Jesus calls the Twelve together, and gives us one of the most important insights into the nature of the kingdom. He says, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave – just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (v. 25-28).
This profound utterance must not be misunderstood. Jesus does not mean that there is no sense in which he exercises authority. Transparently, that is not the case – and in the closing verses Matthew reminds us, as we have seen, that Jesus claims all authority in heaven and on earth.
What he means, rather, is something like this. The kings and rulers and presidents of this fallen world order exercise their authority out of a deep sense of self-promotion, out of a deep sense of wanting to be number one, out of a deep sense of self-preservation, even a deep sense of entitlement. By contrast, Jesus exercises his authority in such a way as to seek the good of his subjects, and that takes him, finally, to the cross.